Worked 1-10 today, working 11-8 tomorrow, 8:30-5:30 Sunday, and then working 9 hour days on Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday, and Sunday.
Also been feeling a little sick lately, I'm all stuffed up and I've been feeling kinda nauseous (which comes and goes). I fighting a little bit of nausea right now, which will hopefully go away.
Other than that, nothing new has really come up. I've been working on some new music, and I've pretty much got the go-ahead from my store manager to take june 30th - july 2nd off, so I can go to the concert at TGA. Went shopping the other day and bought new shoes (Airwalks, and I'm a size 13 now -_-), some CDs (DJ Sammy's Heaven, Dirty Vegas, and Benni Benassi presents The Biz), and this awesome black Army cadet styled hat with a metal Snakes on a Plane emblem on it.
Work has basically been work. No huge changes, just a lot of construction and construction accessories.
I'm looking forward to the party this weekend, but I'd be looking forward to it more if I didn't have to work Saturday AND Sunday.
Other than that, nothing really new has come up. I've gotten leaps and bounds better at IIDX, but no one gives a fuck about that. Its funny though, I only get better when I stop playing for a while.
If only the same thing worked for my love life. I've been out of the game for about 11 months now, and it still sucks being single. Why can't love be more like IIDX? Love needs a clear grading system, modifier options, and the ability to slow down moments to learn how to navigate through them with more than 80% of your life intact.
In the famous words of Haddaway (and TOMOSUKE): What is Love?
Today kinda sucked. I had to call out of work because I woke up with a terrible sinus headache, which led to double vision, congestion, vomiting...all the fun stuff. My parents got wicked pissed at me for calling out, but what was I supposed to do? I can't very well work if I have to stop every 15 minutes to run to the bathroom, and the bathrooms are on the totally opposite corner of the building from where I work. I feel better now, hopefully it lasts, because I'm going into work tomorrow even if it kills me.
And yeah, I'm stealing that music meme that everyone else is using. Few rule modifications.
Guess as many songs as you want. YOU ONLY GET ONE GUESS PER LYRIC THOUGH. So if you guess something for #3, and its wrong, you cant try #3 again. YOU MUST GET ARTIST AND SONG TITLE CORRECT. Minor spelling errors are ok. I have a feeling that a lot of this will be really hard, so I may be lenient if someone gets close to one of the hard ones...I have a lot of obscure music on my PC. FUCK iPODS!
[01] -- Go to IMDB.com and look up your 10 favorite movies or TV shows. [02] -- Post three official IMDB "Plot Keywords" for these 10 picks. [03] -- Have your friends guess the title names
(To make life harder, these are not in order!)
1) Boston / Killed with a cue ball / Strong LanguageThe Boondock Saints 2) Snakes / Plane / Sarcasm (lol)Snakes on a Plane 3) Beethoven / Invented Language / Experiment Gone Wrong 4) Nihilism / Terrorist / SoapFight Club 5) Drug Addict / Electroshock Therapy / Forced ProstitutionRequiem for a Dream 6) Lightsaber / Severed Hand / Twist in the EndJay and Silent Bob Strike Back 7) 2030s / Rogue Cop / Virtual SexDemolition Man 8) Meaning of Life / Character Named After Car / BathrobeThe Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy 9) Death of Protagonist / Shot to Death / Arrow300 10) Briefcase / Mexican Standoff / Nonlinear TimelinePulp Fiction
I wonder if its possible to lose sleep out of frustration of...well, sleep.
I keep having this continuous dream, as in when I fall asleep I start from where it cut off upon waking previously. Its kinda fucked up, in a cosmic sort of way. Sean, if you remember me telling you that I dreamed that I woke up and Lara was sitting next to me, thats when it started. Except I don't think it was Lara now. This girl is in all of my dreams, and when they started, her face and image was incredibly blurry, like looking through a coke bottle into a thick fog. Every time I continue the dream, she gets a little bit clearer. However, from what I can remember, I believe that dream-me is going out with her (haven't gotten a name yet, lol), because it seems like we do all the things that accompany that (and NO, I don't mean that, you sick bastards).
But here comes the worrying part.
I don't want to go to sleep tonight. If any of you really know me, I get upset whenever I make other people feel bad. I don't always show it, but it nags at me. And while this is going to sound totally ridiculous, she was crying when I woke up this morning. Which means, she will be crying when I start dreaming again. I'm pretty sure it was my fault, but I don't remember exactly what I did to cause it. And even though its a dream, it will influence me for the rest of the day. I've had dreams of my mother dying that took me days to get over.
I guess this is just my brain trying to save itself from loneliness. Emo as that sounds, thats the only logical explanation that I can find. Its either that, or I'm going psychotic.
Anyway, I resume training at Home Depot tomorrow at 11. I should probably try to sleep anyway, maybe I cheer her up before I wake up
Hey everyone. As many of you know, my birthday falls on April 1st. I've got an array of exciting activities planned for that weekend, but unfortunately, none of them concern you! No, seriously, I will be in Worcester all weekend and until thursday, so if you wanna drive out there and join me and Sean for a day, be my guest, but I doubt anyone will want to do that :-P
Friday - Call out of work (woo!), then go into work to grab my check (lol). Get picked up, pick up Sean, go to Worcester.
Saturday - Wake up early, call Allen, go to TGA ^_^ Come home as late as possible.
Sunday - My birthday!!! Go to concert (HORSE the BAND and The Number 12 Looks Like You), come home, get hammered.
Monday - Recover from said hammering, hang out, play Wii, Xbox360, PS2, work on my moms computer.
And repeat mondays plans for tuesday - thursday.
This is gonna be SOOOO AWESOME!
Anyway, yeah, my LJ clock is, I believe, accurate. I'm making this post at 5:20 am not because I havent gone to bed yet, but because I just woke up. I'm working 6-2 today >_<
I'm gonna try to get out of work as early as possible today :-P
Well, I'm glad that everyone else is happy that it snowed, even though it makes my life difficult. I can't ride my bike to work because they don't plow the fucking sidewalks around here, and it translates from a 10 minute bike ride to a 35-40 minute walk...not to mention that I seem to have fucked up my ankle last night so it hurts when it twists even slightly (and I'm sure walking on bumpy ice won't make that feel any better)
Anyway, I suppose its a good thing that I'm ill now :-X My entire family got sick the past two days, and I was out of the house as much as possible trying to avoid it, but I seem to have caught something, because I have a terrible stomachache and a freaking migraine
Anyway, I'm gonna go lay down again, my stomach hurts from sitting upright. No video today, I'm not in the mood to find one. Later.
Just woke up, working 11-4, then a big Bemanistyle staff meeting immediately afterwards.
I heard about whats going on at M.M.'s house, don't think I'll be going. I've just got too much shit to do today.
Saw Ghost Rider yesterday, it was pretty good. Blackheart = <3 lol
I've been feeling slightly down lately, really nothing to complain about. I've been thinking a lot about school and the people I knew there, and how it's starting to feel like it never happened.
Heh, a good memory just popped into my head. It was a Saturday night, and I was hanging out with Lara, and...erm..."fell asleep"...yeah, thats what happened. Anyway, when I woke up in the morning, she was standing next to me holding a tray with an omelete, toast, coffee, and orange juice on it. She had made it herself in the kitchen on the floor below hers.
I was wicked touched. I mean, who does that, honestly? I hope I can come across someone like that again, but I can't help feeling that I missed my chance. Oh well, I guess I'll see what happens in the future.
I've been thinking a lot lately (everybody run!) and I've pretty much come to the conclusion that I'm gonna be single and lonely for a long time...and I can't even tell if that bothers me or not.
It is not like I enjoy being single (far from it, I really hate it) but the only other opportunity that I might be able to have doesn't sound much better.
I've also established that the reason for this is just because of the way I've turned out as a person. Yes, I play way too many video games. Yes, I've got weird interests in music and style. Yes, I obsess, I talk a lot, I can be really bitchy, I rage, I have fucked-up dreams, I'm always tired, I'm lazy, I'm a slob when it comes to organization.
But trying to overhaul my life just to potentially satisfy somebody else just doesn't seem right. I feel wicked selfish for saying this, but I believe that I have the way to live my life the way I want to. I shouldn't have to change just to make people like me.
However, I also feel like if I don't change anything about myself, I'm never gonna find somebody.
Which leads me to the point of this diatribe: Is there anybody out there for me?
...Yeah, I really didn't think so
EDIT: GRAPHIC CONTENT, but still fun as hell to watch
Reserved Supreme Commander at Gamestop the other day, release is Feb. 21st. I can't wait ^_^
Also, Eddie (Head Webmaster) at Bemanistyle has been talking about major changes to the site lately, and I volunteered for more mod duties, so hopefully I can make at least some kind of forum mod or even global.
Work sucked today. It was me on service and a manager on grill. That was it. For like two hours X-(
I've been feeling much better lately, even though I haven't been seeing my friends nearly as much.
Went to TGA on sunday. IIDX was broken for like the first four hours, so I played a bunch of custom simfiles on the ITG2r21 machine, including Bohemian Polka, The Bad Touch (Eiffel 65 remix), Viridian City (yeah, from the Pokemon tv show :3) and Baby got Back. They were fun! IIDX was fixed around 4 or 5 ish, got in only a few games of that. Played a crapload of Drummania, guitar freaks, a couple games of pump it up, and some good old Beatmania The Final. Broke out Guitar Hero 2 later on in the day and passed Beast and the Harlot, Institutionalized, and Free Bird, all on expert.
I was supposed to go to my doctor's on monday, but they called me at 9 in the morning with a boatload of irony. Apparently, my doctor called out sick :-P. So I told them to cancel the appt because I feel fine and I dont have health insurance anyway. Later on, I got called into work, which is good because I need more money. Worked tuesday as well.
Today I got up early and got some breakfast before work, worked until 4 (when I was supposed to be off) but then someone called in and said they were going to be late, so I decided to stay longer. It was me, a manager, and one grill person. Thats it. When the girl finally came in, I threw the headset at her and walked out the door. I don't even think I bothered to punch out (honestly, I dont remember).
Ever since then, I've been playing a bunch of games. I got RollerCoaster Tycoon 3 and the expansions, as well as Sega AGES Vol.25 for the PS2. Haven't had a chance to try the AGES thing yet, but apparently its a large collection of all the different tetris games :-P
Anyway, I'm not working tomorrow, so if someone wants to hang out, give me a call or a message. I shall leave you with one of my favorite songs ever from IIDX: Guhroovy f/w NO+CHIN - 5PM ETERNAL (IIDX 9th Style CS)
I've been feeling slightly better about this whole thing, which is a relief because I'm finally getting more than two hours of sleep a night.
I had to ride my bike to/from work today, and it turns out that I didn't even have to work today. *FACEPALM* They gave me a few hours anyway, but that consisted of standing in the drive-thru, slowly becoming a human popsicle. I saw Missy's mom, Sarah B., and one of the Woonsocket TGA kids, which was cool.
I'll be at the Talent Show tonight hanging out with Joel and friends, come find us! (Psst, I'm bringing Sean's DS...if you have one, bring it, and we can chat about the talent show all sneaky like :-P)
Finally, I shall conclude with the music video to Razor Ramon Sumitani's first single. You might know him as HARD GAY!
Those of you with weak constitutions, kindly skip this entry
[24 Jan 2007|12:18am]
[
mood
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zombified
]
[
music
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Orgy - Blue Monday
]
Hey everybody.
Spent the last few days at my moms house, which was nice. Working tomorrow 11-4, then chilling with Kim and (hopefully) Sean.
As far as the shit involving last week, I'm still slightly upset about it, which I don't think will go away anytime soon. However, I am learning to deal with it, so I don't end up being a miserable lump all day.
I had a dream about it the other day, and I woke up screaming bloody murder. Like, not crying-screaming or OMG-I'M-IN-PAIN-screaming, but like a gutural roar "I'm fucking pissed off and someone's gonna die" screaming. At least, thats how my brother described it. I feel so bad for the kid...he got to bed late, had work at 6 am, and I wake up the whole house at 4 am screaming my head off for no good reason. Like, it wasn't even my fault...I was screaming before I woke up and I stopped as soon as I realized what was going on, but apparently that wasnt until my brother jumped out of his recliner and shook me awake. I haven't had an episode like that since I was really little, and it really scared me.
The worst part was that I was so angry about the dream that I felt the overwhelming urge to attack my brother when he woke me up, because I didn't know what was going on. I probably would have taken a swing at him if he didn't have my arms pinned to my sides to keep me from thrashing around on the ground and breaking something.
That happened monday morning. I had fallen asleep at 2 am, woke up at 4 am. I havent slept since.
Anyway, here's a good song to lighten the mood (familiar music always makes me feel better). I've gotta try to force myself to get some sleep because I have to work tomorrow, and I don't think they'll take "insomnia due to a demi-psychotic episode" as a valid excuse for my absence.
I'm not gonna lie, 30 Seconds to Mars is like one of my guilty pleasures. And this video just makes me laugh my ass off for some reason. I'm starting to feel better, though I don't really know how long that will last for.
Today was...not so great. In fact, by comparison, its probably one of the worse days I've had in a while.
I was supposed to work 9-3 today, but they ended up keeping me until 4:15. And due to it being MLK day, it was packed constantly. And everyone seemed to be in a wicked bad mood. I, on the other hand, was in a particularly good mood when I woke up this morning, but that quickly went downhill too. Dealing with all the assholes at work seemed to rub off on me.
After that, I went to go hang out with joel, and that was pretty cool, I guess. We picked up Sean and played Wii. I don't know, I just really wasn't into it. I basically did nothing but mope around, which made me feel even worse, because I knew I was getting on nerves, I just couldnt help it.
I just got home, and now I feel the inexplicable urge to shut my lights off, stare at my blank walls, and totally rethink my life, and I really don't like where that's going.
Whatever. I'll be online until I fall asleep/pass out/give up...and I'm disabling comments on this post. If you still feel the need to talk to me, IM me on aim.
Well, this week kinda sucked :-P. New years was fine, got to go to TGA, eat some awesome japanese food, and I finally got a flash drive for In The Groove 2 (so I can play my own songs!)
After that, everything went downhill. I had to call out of work (Yes, I finally started at McD's again) because I was wicked sick, so I only got two days this week. I was supposed to go to TGA with Evan on sunday, but I think I have to cancel because I just dont have the money and I have loan payments due. Hell, I'm not even sure I have enough to cover those :-( In hindsight, maybe going to TGA the first time wasnt the greatest idea, but oh well...it already happened right? Can't do much about it now.
Anyway, in better news, I have become a moderator on www.bemanistyle.com , the greatest music game site ever. Its pretty fun, I get to deal with idiots and trolls, which can be enjoyable if you are in a position of power over said idiot trolls :-P.
Anyway, seeing as how I'm not going to TGA on sunday, my schedule just totally opened up. I've got a few people I'd REALLY like to hang out with (Joel and Sean, I'm looking at you :-P) , so if people are free on sunday, GIVE ME A CALL, MESSAGE, WHATEVER!
Anyway, I gotta go. Got some moderating to do. I'll talk to you all later.
Hey everybody. I'm not sure if I'm gonna have internet access tomorrow (going to my Mom's tonight) so I figured I'd wish everyone a Merry Christmas now.
Well, Merry Christmas :-P
Anyway, still haven't been called by McDonalds to tell me when to start yet, so I'll probably be back home Monday or Tuesday. If anyone wants to hang out or go do something this week, let me know!
I have decided that, because I have gotten the complete collection of Beatmania IIDX Official Soundtracks, that I would re-do the "Life soundtrack" meme with just them.
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